You know, sometimes we hold on to some ideas and beliefs very tightly and even suffer for it. But when we dig deep, we discover that nothing justifies them.
Some of the most common answers I have received when I ask stay-at-home or work-from-home mums why they do not have help at home are:
1. They are scared of bringing a stranger into their home and are wary of negative experiences of employers that are publicized.
2. Their total household income cannot accommodate a domestic staff’s salary.
3. Their spouses object to the idea.
4. They want to be involved in their children’s lives, you don’t want a nanny.
I don’t know if any of these answers reflect what your reasons are, but they are valid. However, in my books they are not valid enough to totally shut out the possibility of hiring extra hands at all.
And trust me when I say I understand the emotion and strong reasons behind all these answers because I have been in your shoes. But if despite all the structuring and time management, you still feel overwhelmed with chores, without time for yourself and lack of accomplishment of your personal goals, it means you have to consider getting some form of help.
I believe hiring help is inevitable at some point in life. It’s a decision that no matter how far you push, you still have to come to face.
So if your decision not to have ANY form of help now is based on fear or finances or spousal rejection, I have a few solutions or alternatives to consider instead of hiring a full time help. These may work for you.
1. If you are scared of having a stranger constantly in your space, consider going the live-out route and keep cleaning visits limited to 3 days a week and a maximum of 3-4 hours per day. This way, you are in total control of time spent and can still function well for the remaining hours of the day.
2. For finances, you can consider finding a more affordable approach. Which could be
a. Find someone who charges per hour or per visit. If you can afford to pay for 8 hours monthly, find a way to spread it across the month and for visits, calculate how many visits you can afford and schedule major cleaning for those days.
b. Find someone who does specific chores. E.g Laundry, fetching water etc. A tip for this is to outsource the most tedious chore, so that you are left with simple ones.
3. If your spouse doesn’t like the idea of a domestic staff, sell him other options mentioned above. So many people only think in terms of live-in when it comes to hiring a staff, but there are many arrangements that can happen based on your needs and preference. Nothing is cast in stone.
4. If you want to be involved in your children’s lives, by all means do just that. I have clients who have domestic staff that do not do anything for their kids. They bath, dress up, do school prep, prepare meals, homework for their kids by themselves. So you can hire a domestic staff and limit the scope of work to housekeeping alone.
Would you be willing to try any of these options? Think about how much more time and rest you would have if you had a little bit of help few times in a month.
I want you to lose the stress in 2020 and I am committed to making that happen.
Enjoy your weekend.